Live your theology.

Here is my second installment of the Westminster Shorter Catechism. as always, it is in yo best interest to pay attention, sucka!

Q: What rule hath God given to direct us how we may glorify and enjoy him?

A: The word of God, which is contained in the scriptures of the Old and New Testaments, is the only rule to direct us how we may glorify and enjoy him.

Why do we call the Bible the word of God? Because that’s what it is, fool! Don’t believe all that jibba-jabba ’bout the Bible being invented by fools – because it was the immediate inspiration of the Spirit of God – “All Scripture is given by inspiration of God.” (2 Timothy 2:16) I’ll prove it, too; Aside from the majesty of the Word itself, the way it provides answers to mystery, fulfilled prophecies, and how the writers have died for what God has revealed to them. The burden is on you sucka, to explain why Peter, Paul, James, and the other apostles were willing to die for the Scriptures, if they just made them up.

That just don’t play out in real life, fool. I constantly run into thugs and henchmen working fool drug lords. The suckas make good money, too. But none of them are willing to die at the hand of T for their causes. One time, I remember me an Hannibal were looking for this girl that was kidnapped. I had just blown up a bunch of fools with a grenade, and some of them was still conscious (normally A-team grenades only cause people to do front flips and get knocked out, they ain’t fatal). Murdock asked the fool where the girl was, and he lied about not knowing. So I picked him up and said I’d throw him off a cliff if he didn’t tell Mr. T the truth. He wasn’t willing to die for his lie – no one is.

Now that you know about the word, you might ask why we can’t just rely on reason to show us how to glorify God. Because reason ain’t good enough – no matter what fools like David Hume & Voltaire say, reason alone cannot provide us with all the answers, only revelation can. To assume that we can determine all things through reason alone, is an unreasonable opinion, since we have no transcendent pillar to place our presuppositions in. Thus our reason must start at some point, and if that point is not the revelation of God, then our reason is spurious. In other words, if Hume & Voltaire were still alive, I’d bonk they heads together and tie them to a tree until the police could come & put them in jail. I’m just kidding about that – I only bonk the heads of criminal suckas who are trying to hurt T – I would only bonk they heads in the form of philosophical debate, but the results would be the same, fool.

Thomas Vincent said “Whatever spirit leads fools against or beside the rule of Scriptures isn’t the Spirit of God in truth, but the spirit of error and delusion.” That’s talkin’ about fools and suckas like Joseph Smith & Benny Hinn. “Beloved, believe not every spirit, but try the spirits whether they are of God; because many false prophets are gone out into the world. We are of God: he that knoweth God heareth us; he that is not of God heareth us not. Hereby know the spirit of truth, and the spirit of error.” (1 John 4:1,6)Why do we do everything to the glory of God? Because he created you, fool! The end, sucka!

For more Westminster Shorter Catechism goodness, see the inspiration for this series – Thomas Vincent’s The Shorter Catechism Explained from Scripture (Puritan Paperbacks)